oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
