we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He put oyster crackers in his ramen noodles. Is that a thing? Because holy shit I had never thought of it before and if it's not a thing he's my new stoner hero for discovering it.
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
Randomize