What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
I seriously just forgot to push down the toaster twice in a row \n\nSo I've been waiting 8 minutes for toaster strudels that I haven't even started... Too high
My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?
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