curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
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