So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
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