So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
Eating Doritos is not nearly as enjoyable when I'm not drunkenly feeding them to peacocks.
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
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