If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
Semen is not good for contacts.
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
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