Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
Randomize
