Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
When I took off my jeans he became more excited about my Elmo underwear than sex but to be fair, who can blame him. They're awesome undies.
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
Randomize
