Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
Randomize
