I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
Randomize