I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
I just dropped a paperclip into my cleavage while talking to the company president... That's an awkward moment.
Did you at least offer to let him get it out??
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
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