GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
Did you just see the Batmobile???
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
I feel like that japanese guy who ate all the hotdogs. Except replace hotdogs with sailor jerrys. And instead of a trophy and world record I just get a hangover at work
Randomize
