Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
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