Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
A freshman just referred to Home Improvement as 'tim the tool man show'. People born after 1990 are not people.
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
We talked him into tasing himself.
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
Randomize
