Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
Randomize
