Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
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