is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
It would have to be recorded, because that sex tape would be humanity's primary evidence of miracles
We should get Al Michaels to provide commentary for it.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
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