I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
You'll never fully grasp an awkward walk of shame until you run into his mom while you're trying to sneak out. Then to make matters worse you have to ask her to mover car because it's blocking you in.
and I lost my effing shirt.
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