u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
This morning was so rough I can't even. I was cutting up vegetables for my omelet on the floor. THE FLOOR. I sat on the floor because I felt like I was gonna vom.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Randomize
