Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
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Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
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So stoned i forgot i was in bed
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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