Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
The bartender gave me a roll of masking tape so I could tape my heels to my feet so I wouldn't lose them when i went drunk running later that night
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
That's just a really flattering way of saying, "Yes, you're useless, but you have great tits."
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Randomize
