too bad you live with your parents still
so im in the parking lot of taco bell eating a taco...and some girl just got out of a car and screamed at the top of her lungs "XANEX FOR SALE!!!!" i fucking love Hamilton.
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
i wish you were under my bed. you sexy russian fur trapper.
please. text the right number. youve been sending me these all night.
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
Randomize
