We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
I will have you know I turned Latino David Arquette down for sex because he's married. Total. Moral. Victory.
Flo's in town, ain't she.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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