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• (618): View more from Illinois

  lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...

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• (602): View more from Arizona

  either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.

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• (608): View more from Wisconsin

  I made two strippers play rock paper scissors to see who would give me a lap dance last night

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• (206): View more from Washington

  I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.

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  19 Characteristics That Make People Instantly Attractive

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• (937): View more from Ohio

  They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.

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• (863): View more from Florida

  I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.

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• (609): View more from New Jersey

  My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days

  (1-609): View more from New Jersey

  Sounds like the perfect vacation

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• (864): View more from South Carolina

  He looks like he'd be great Lego character.

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• (589): View more from

  seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.

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  25 People Confess What They’re Shamefully Attracted To

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• (516): View more from New York

  I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.

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• (989): View more from Michigan

  You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.

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• (716): View more from New York

  Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.

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• (330): View more from Ohio

  I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.

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• (928): View more from Arizona

  Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.

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• (650): View more from California

  I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!

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