like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
19 Of The Most Epic “I Quit’ Stories Ever
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
"Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
25 People Reveal The Creepiest Kids They Went to School With
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-