Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Randomize
