3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
Randomize
