i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
I'm giving random strangers at the bar sips of my fishbowl, then telling them I have Ebola. It's a fun night.
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
Randomize
