Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
I'm at an open mic night and the next act is called 'the best creed cover band ever.' The guy i recently hooked up with is on bass.
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
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