Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
i may or may not be watching the land before time
I just woke up covered In blood, I have cuts all over my body, I can't find my clothes from last night, I'm still wasted, i'm pretty sure I have a sprained ankle, and the best part is, I have absolutely no recollection of what led to this. THAT'S why vodka is the greatest drink in the world.
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
So apparently I’m into choking now
Randomize