Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Randomize
