It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
I have to take tonight off from shenanigans. My liver is planning a coup
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
Randomize
