Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
You thought you were Snapchating on your tablet, but were really just poking John Stamos' face on my Full House dvd case...
I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
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