I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
Randomize
