Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
The only reason you're wearing underwear tonight is cause you have a family dinner before
i would totally switch to progressive if they'd let me bang that girl in the commercial.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
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