David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
Next Halloween, remind me to find a different wingman. Walking out in your pirate costume talking like Captain Ahab while i was banging her and telling me I had to harpoon the white whale really pissed her off.
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
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