How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
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