Don't you send me to vm
Non-Jews are for practice
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
I made my uber driver take a pit stop between clubs so we could restock on Xanax. #priorities
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
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