He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
Randomize
