OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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