You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
Really dude? drunk texts at 9 in the morning? its wednesday
Randomize
