Hey guys thanks for lettin me crash at your place for the weekend, I had a great time. PS I got three quarters of a hand job from an asian on the dance floor last night. True story.
dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is the prime rib incident all over again
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
Randomize