when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
Someone signed my nipple.
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