i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
Pretty sure he proposed because my house is awesome. His ass is a ten and he's offering to pay more than half the bills... How expensive is a divorce really? I mean I could probably put up with him for three or four years but a lifetime is a big ask.
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