i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
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Seriously. What did you do to me. You have a monstercoooooock.
I can't believe I just typed monstercoooooock. Twice.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
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There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
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