i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
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