I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We just shotgunned beers for America
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
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