im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
My mom gets in bar fights. She doesn't go to bed early.
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
I just got carded by a ten year old.
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
Randomize