This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
Randomize
