I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
I just had an epiphany. There is NOTHING TO STOP ME from making cake mix and eating it all instead of making a cake. It feels like my entire life has peaked at this moment.
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
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